on being ugly

Remember that time I spent a summer (and a half) cooking food for small children in the mountains and couldn't stop talking about how much I loved it? Oh, what? You don't remember? That's fine, I don't really keep tabs on you either.

This weekend I spent a couple days retracing my steps through the greasy cafeteria, quaking aspens, and tangles of boondoggle at Mill Hollow, remembering the best summer of my life.

Aspens, boondoggle, and people I love. 

It was sort of a funky experience...like when you go walk through your old elementary school after years of being away. Except this was better because I didn't have to remember myself as an awkward little girl with missing teeth. I got to remember myself in a place where I found my adult self. I know that's totally lame-o sounding. But the summer I spent there I figured out who I was and got a little closer to discovering who I want to become.

I have this weird dandelion fetish. TMI? whatever. No, I'm not kissing it. 

Something about that mountain air (or maybe it was the fumes from all the rotten milk I had to smell?) made me feel real and authentic and strangely lovely. Which is ironic because I was hideous. I don't think I've ever been so ugly as I was that summer (not counting the mushroom haircut and braces in 5th grade. At least I was clean then.) Just imagine constant greasy hair, bacon stench, no makeup, bleach-stained clothes, and bandannas as your coolest accessory (used to hide the hairnet underneath). It's refreshing to be ugly. It's sort of this weirdy experience where you have to be who you are because you have no facade to hide behind.

Favorite stretch of highway in all of the world. 

It was nice to go back and remember my ugly self and the amazing adventures of a couple unforgettable summers as a hippie. I chatted with a group of soon-to-be 6th graders at camp last week and asked what their favorite part about Mill Hollow was. One blondie stepped forward while her friends giggled around her and said, "Honestly?...(dramatic pause)...everything."

I couldn't agree more.

PS...how can you stand in a place like this and not believe there's a God? Check out this talk for more on God's love for His children. Love love love it.